Birthdays

by

Stephanie Shockley

As you all know everyday is someone’s birthday. But are you aware that in the land of school, not only is every day someone’s birthday, but it’s also someone’s half-birthday? Yes, that’s right; in this day and age it’s not enough to celebrate the day you are born. You must also receive presents on the day that is exactly six months after your actual birth date. I believe that a “moment of conception” party would have more meaning than this half-birthday ordeal. I’d love to hear one of my students cheerfully exclaim that, “Today is the day my mommy and daddy got it on. Would you like a cupcake?”

The parents of Properly Perfect School, especially the moms, all believe that the holidays must be celebrated as well. Whenever a certain time of year approaches, notes, phone calls and emails are sent asking if, “I could come in and celebrate with you and my little Lily? St. Patrick’s Day is a very special holiday for our family, as we are 1/20 Irish. An hour or so should do for a well-thought out party, don’t you agree?” My favorite party was when the organizing room mother had a break-down in front of the kids when they would not respond to her pleas for silence: “Hey! Shut-up! The other mothers and I have put a lot of effort into planning this Christmas/Hanukah/Kwanzaa celebration. The least you could do is listen to me when I speak. Honestly, I don’t know how you can listen to your teacher, but not to us!”